Happy 2017!
Dude, this will be a big year for you.
new bedroom at 29 Richardson
13 to 14
Graduate from middle school
Start high school
Grow taller, more body changes
Smarter, funnier.
It’s a funky transition going from kid to teenager. I remember how that felt; you never forget! My most challenging years were (without question) eight and ninth grades. I was immature; a lousy athlete, big ears, glasses, smart, nervous. To make matters worse, I was in a wheelchair the summer between eighth grade and Freshman year due to a bone disease in my knees. The self confidence I had from kindergarten to seventh grade had pretty much disappeared (Why? Where did it go? How did it happen? Who the heck knows!) Welcome to the teenage years!.
There’s salvation for you in gaming. For me it was popular music. I couldn’t sing, I wasn’t in a band, but man did I ever listen to and enjoy it rock and roll music. It was 1966, 1967 & 1968, arguably the greatest years in rock & roll history. The Beatles; Beach Boys; Hollies; Mamas & the Papas; Tommy James & the Shondells; Simon & Garfunkel; The Rolling Stones; Donovan; The Lovin’ Spoonful; Monkees – and too many more to mention. Music filled my life and became something I’ve enjoyed ever since ( I wrote about this in the ‘being 10’ blog I wrote for you).
Teenage Time is weird because while everything seems similar, everything feels different. You love your parents, but man, sometimes they are a pain in the butt. You know school is important to your future, but you don’t feel like dealing with teachers and homework. Being healthy matters, but damn if those chips & donuts don’t taste too good to ignore. I’d like to get to know that person better, but what do I say? That kid thinks he’s so cool; I wish I was popular like that. It’s an upside down world that makes no sense some days.
You think to yourself, “why am I thinking all these thoughts? I never did when I was younger, I was just… myself.” That’s the paradox of teenage years… you’re old enough to know things are different… because they are. Change isn’t easy to go through at any time of our lives.
Someone described teenage years like this:
“When you’re too young for half the things you want to do and too old to do the other half.”
It’s a topsy turvy time with conflicting emotions, thoughts, desires, priorities. You’re in between big and little, neither one fitting particularly well. Jumbled up, confused, happy, sad, confident, scared, hopeful, nervous. Sometimes the best solution is just to hunker down and try to ignore most of it!
The good news is that things start to take shape. You go from feeling awkward, to being more comfortable with your body. You go from thinking like everyone is looking at you, judging you, to being your own person and liking who you are. You go from being uncertain about what to do to knowing how to deal with people, and situations. You go from not knowing what the heck to say, to expressing yourself more completely.
Four things make it better. 1. Time. 2. Your own unique talents, traits & attributes. 3. A family who cares. 4. Pushing yourself.
1. As time passes, you have more time to figure things out, things get clearer, easier.
2. Having something meaningful about yourself to build on helps a lot. I listed a bunch of things that make you special – like your fantastic sense of humor – in your last birthday blog. Believe in yourself, and DO NOT compare yourself to other people. Be your own self, that’s the key. We have our own special talents and attributes that make us unique. Be aware of those and build on them!
3. be thankful for – and leverage – those who care about you most.
If a person has a family “infrastucture” where people love and care about them, well, they’ve got it all. Friends are important, but they don’t exist to protect and shape the best person you can possibly be. Your Mom, Dad, grandparents (sometimes Aunt, Uncle, sibling) are the ones who will always be there for you, in good times and bad. If you’ve got that, you’ve got an awesome foundation to to grow and win. Without it, a person is on their own, trying to navigate rough waters they’ve never sailed through before with friends who haven’t done it either!
4. While it may be the last thing you feel like doing sometimes, it’s important to keep pushing yourself. I don’t care what age we are, I hold this belief dearly. We all need dreams, hopes, desires. Without it, life is meaningless. Getting to where you want to go is the adventure that is life.
So, try not to let yourself get into a rut. Get together with your friends in person, laugh, talk to people, do something you wouldn’t normally do (read a book; listen to music; try a new sport; exercise; wear something different, whatever!). Mix it up; don’t repeat the same cycle every day in terms of what you do. There’s something magical in trying new things. Variety is the spice of life and I can tell you from personal experience, it is absolutely invigorating. As a kid, I enjoyed doing different things, and am still that way today.
All we know for sure during the teenage years is that we ARE headed someplace new, different, better. And at the end of the day, that’s a cool place to be.
