Happy birthday Ben!

One of the highlights of my life has been watching you grow up, from a tentative, shy little kid to a smart, fun (young) man.  “Watching” isn’t the right word to describe our relationship and what you’ve meant to me over these 15 years… because it’s passive.  What we’ve had is an active relationship.  I’ve been by your side from the beginning, not literally every day, but there for all your important life events and a whole bunch of other ordinary life moments that were special every time I was with you.

You were grandchild #1.  I spent more time with you than any other grandchild.  You lived with us at the “big house” on Waterloo (a couple times), you lived at our beach house one summer (2016) and Grammy and I have helped your family get to a better place.  So rewarding, so fulfilling.

Along the way we’ve done some such cool things together, including…

Ziplining. Beaching. Laughing. Walking. Vacationing. Riding. Swimming. Eating. Traveling. Playing. Learning. Going. Talking. Sharing. Being.

It’s sometimes hard & frankly a little weird going through life changes.  From first born to little kid to older kid to young adult – that’s a massive leap forward!  The spontaneity of childhood transforms as you (not just “you” literally but all the you’s and we’s and us’s out there) grow older and leave some stuff behind.

Now you’re in high school ( how can that be) with your own friends, interests and ways of doing things.  As you leave some of the past behind, you’re zipping forward, shaping a new life that will become YOUR life, especially once you reach college (so close already).  As the new you takes shape, you’ll find the important things – the things that make you who you are – will continue to shape Ben Clickman.  The closeness of a very loving family.  Knowing how to laugh and make others laugh.  Using your impressive brain to learn new things.  Helping others by being kind and caring.

It’s cool watching you grow up.  Every time I see you – and are with you – I’m instantly happy.  The best thing of all is getting a hug and a “I love you Papa” from grandchild #1.  There’s nothing better.  I could cry when you do this, but I don’t want to embarass myself!  Don’t ever stop because it feeds my soul and lights up my life. It will never get old, even if I’m lucky enough to grow wicked old, all my hair falls out and my back bends toward the earth.

I’m proud of you and unbelievably proud of who you are.  Always believe in yourself, even when you feel like you don’t know exactly where things are headed.  Believe in yourself –  and never compare yourself to others.  There’s only one Ben Clickman and that’s a wonderful thing.

Always listen to the little voice inside your soul – always follow the gut feel, it will never steer you wrong.  You just have to keep listening, it’s always there, and will be all the days of your life.

I love you Ben, with every fiber of my being.  I’m so darn lucky to have you in my life.

Happy 15th!